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July 1st, 2018


4 kittens

Do Repair the Mangled, Now.

Posted on 2018.07.01 at 22:05
This has of course been a ruthlessly awful stretch for anyone who believes in healthy, happy, progressive values. Here's a quote I liked:

"Do not be daunted by the enormity of the world's grief...You are not obligated to complete the work, but neither are you free to abandon it."

It showed up in my FB feed, but I edited it down.  In those ellipses, I removed "Do justly, now. Love mercy, now. Walk humble, now" because that's just a little too didactic, Monsieur Talmud, when we're already feeling bad about ourselves. The quote was attributed to the Talmud, but seems to be a mashup of sources, so I don't feel too bad about excising the middle. This link and this link say that the parts I kept are from Pirkei Avos, and the middle, excised bit is from Micah 6:8.   (The grammar alone of the middle bit is just too pretentious by half. Love mercy? Why don't you marry it?)

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"Do THESE fit me?!"

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The big kids are at City Day Camp these days. It's $32/week, if you can believe that. But they only take kids who have completed 1st grade and above. Pokey made it over a full week before getting kicked out. In his defense, he was playing Jenga, which is ill-suited to his already wafer-thin tolerance for frustration. We're making him write a letter of apology to his counselor.

But the City Camp: they're learning so much there! Like: "If you tickle my pickle, I'll give you a nickel!" and "Call me a bitch. Bitch means dog. Dog means bark. Bark means trees, trees means nature, and nature is beautiful, so you just called me beautiful!"

In the latter, Hawaii didn't actually learn it that way. She learned it as, "Call me ugly. Ugly means dog. Dog means bark...etc."  But clearly that was the youthful adaptation to avoid the B-word, because "ugly means dog" doesn't quite make sense.

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Nice act you got there, what do you call yourself?



The Incredibles!

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Speaking of things that don't make sense, I need to violate confidentiality in order to share a delightful quote. I was on a disciplinary panel, and so of course I'm not supposed to go share any details. BUT I MUST, judiciously.

One of the (many) incidents described in the report packed involves this quote, attributed to the bully: "Those hurdles are close together because they're attracted, but you're not attractive."

The correct response is to squint and cock your head, because that doesn't make much sense (and also doesn't carry much sting.) Then, in the interview portion, the victim was asked about the incident, and she recounted it as thus:
"I walked up and said, 'Why are those hurdles so close together?' and he said, 'It's called attraction - you wouldn't understand.' "

Now that is a great line! Zing!  I mean, his behavior was overall totally unacceptable, but in a different context, that line would be great.  Save it for someone with whom you have a healthy banter.

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I guess the theme of the week is "repairing mangled quotes" but I've only got those three. Now you try!

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Kitties love a crow's nest! Not simultaneously, they don't.



Over Monday and Tuesday, OJ continued to get sicker. At one point I brought him some water and he drank it enthusiastically, and I realized with horror that I should have been bringing him water all this time, because he wasn't getting himself there.

Then the antibiotics must have kicked in, and he re-emerged, and has been his old self since.  Fluffy was really pissed off when OJ returned to the living world, and kept hissing and growling at him. About right for siblings in this house.

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What about "repairing mangled tattoos"? I'm pretty angry about Mama Cat.  The artist dramatically changed her anatomy. It was not detectable in the stencil, and plus the whole thing is on my back, so I can't see it directly. But when she filled it in, she altered the cat's posture significantly.

The reason the grotesque half of Mama Cat is so grotesque is partially a result of this posture shift, and partially just clunky execution of the top half.  My mom has solved the grotesque-ness with some deft shading, so the current cat will look fine. (Provided the artist copies this time, instead of improvising.)   I cancelled tomorrow's appointment in order to spend more time trying to fix it - like, would I prefer to get it back to the original posture? Or is it a lost cause and I should embrace the new posture?

Finally: the cat on my back is the mirror image of the original painting, not a direct copy, and I didn't realize this.  I would have provided her with the mirror image, if only I'd known! Instead, she was reflecting it in her head as she went. I'm pretty angry about this. Why didn't she say something!  I'm sure that's partly why the anatomy got mangled. The artist's intuition for anatomy is pretty terrible - I've caught lots of her errors, and I wish she would stop trusting herself to improvise.

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Good rock throwing, Rascal!



Go get another one!

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Ace is now using a booster seat with a regular seatbelt, instead of a five-point harness. This means she can get herself in and out of the car by herself. This is one of my most favorite milestones of all. It may be the one true marker distinguishing a Kid from a Little Kid.

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Hawaii can hang a spoon from her nose!



Pokey can hang a big plastic cooking spoon from his nose!



Ace can hang a spoon from her nose!



Rascal can hold the spoon in place on his nose!



Hawaii can walk around like an influencer with a spoon on her nose!



and she can bake a beautiful banana bread:



with chocolate chips.
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